The last 24 hours I've felt a bit meh. We all have those days sometimes I guess, but pregnancy can be hard going at times, making them a bit more likely. I have to say that I honestly do absolutely love being pregnant most of the time (though as you read through this post it may not be all that apparent!) and I do know just how lucky I am but there is no doubt it does make life just a little bit harder. Some days it's hard to feel like I have much of a pregnancy glow when I have laughed off being asked several times in one day if I'm sure my dates are right or if I'm sure it's not twins as I'm apparently 'huge' according to everyone and in reality I feel unattractive, heavy and fat, have swollen, achy feet and horrible cankles in place of my usually petite ankles and I can't sit still properly due to my back pain. The fact that I'm feeling like this at 26 weeks pregnant rather than in the last couple of weeks before my due date only makes it harder as with another three months still to go I'm nowhere near the home straight yet!
In all fairness there's really nothing much up with me, I know so many people who have had way, way tougher pregnancies than me with serious illnesses and complications with the baby so I do feel like I'm being a bit of a spoilt princess by moaning when I am lucky to be having a really straightforward pregnancy with a very healthy baby. But you know what they say, even though your neighbour has a broken leg it still hurts if you stub your toe!
Last night after a day at work wearing heels my feet were aching and swollen, my back hurt so much that I just couldn't get comfortable and I've got a really annoying cough that hurts my bump and my back. I was tired, very grumpy and possibly (definitely) a bit hormonal! I asked Mr T to rub my back and then my feet but he got bored after half a minute distracted by his phone (I can't say I blame him, my puffy feet closely resembled fat trotters, with slightly too long toenails with chipped nail polish – being presented with them was not going to be a highlight of his Friday evening!) which just made me a bit grumpier. After knocking over Mr T's beer which he'd left on the floor (and I hadn't spotted due to my bump obscuring my view of my feet) I felt like a ridiculous clumsy hippo and I ended up going to bed not long after half past nine where I managed to fall asleep but had a restless night of trying to get comfortable.
This morning when I woke up I was still in pain with my back, was irritated by my stupid cough and blocked nose and felt a bit restless and frankly still in a bit of a grump. I got up to get Totsy up who got straight into bed with daddy then I made us all breakfast which we had in bed and then read my book a bit and when Mr T and Totsy ventured downstairs I stayed put just pathetically feeling a bit sorry for myself. Mr T did ask if I was okay and wondered what was wrong but to be honest I knew it would sound a bit ridiculous and I was pretty sure if I started to say I just felt fat and sore that I would actually burst into tears which would just add to the ridiculousness of it all (and I'm a really ugly crier, so it would have definitely made things worse!)
After a while I decided I had the choice to either stay in bed feeling crappy about myself and write the whole day off, or I could get up and get on with it. Now despite the undeniably whiney tone of this post I'm not really the sort to wallow for long, so I gave myself a mental kick up the backside and chose the latter.
Because I was feeling a bit shit about how I looked I decided the best way forward was to make a bit of an effort, so I put some hair dye on (shock, my black hair has a tendency to show grey if left to its own devices), sorted out my toenails (no mean feat with my bump but I managed!) had a lovely long shower then got dressed in something cheerful but comfy and put a load of makeup on including a bright lippy. Then we went out for lunch. And you know what, it actually worked, I felt much better. Still fat, still sore but no longer grumpy!
I absolutely love my new kimono that I bought from New Look this week, though I can see that it's either a love it or hate it kind of thing (to be honest, Mr T looked a bit startled when he first saw it!) and I suppose you could mistakenly think I'm wearing my dressing gown! But I don't care, it's bright and I think it's really pretty. Plus it's yellow, my favourite colour and undeniably cheerful. And it definitely brightened up my mood today.
So pregnant mamas, if you're having one of those days, just know you're not alone, we all have them – let yourself wallow a bit then get up, get your favourite clothes on and get on with it. After all, we all know it will be worth every single second when our beautiful babies are here. And then we will no doubt look back fondly on our pregnancies and even miss our beautiful bumps!